Get a Cat* - Children

Two men stand on a field of white. The one on the left is a handsome white man, about 50, distinguished, knowledgeable, and stylishly dressed for dinner at a seaside restaurant. A three-year-old boy is on his shoulders with legs wrapped tightly around the man’s neck. The child is yelling and waving his arms as the Monohull man desperately tries to maintain his balance.

Use Cake
Originally uploaded by toastfloats.

On the right is a much younger man, casually attired in Bermuda shorts, Crocs, an open T-shirt, and hailing from some mixed Pan-Pacific ancestry. A pleasant jingle plays in the background unobtrusively.

The younger man speaks first, glancing over at his colleague, shouting to be heard over the screaming child, “Hello, I’m a Catamaran!!”

Panting and barely heard over the bellowing toddler, Monohull bellows out “And I’m a Monohull!”

Catamaran looks concerned and puts ups his hands to try to help prevent the boy from falling, “Monohull, are you okay? What's with the kid?”

Monohull tries to capture the boy’s flailing hands and gasps, “Oh, it’s just my nephew. He’s visiting today. I'm trying to keep him busy while my wife gets dinner together.”

“How about I take him for a bit? Give you a breather…” Catamaran offers, holding out his arms for the child.

Monohull happily pulls the child off his shoulders and passes him over, “Will you? That would be great. Just give me a chance to…”

Monohull stops talking as the child in Catamaran’s arms disappears and a peaceful silence descends over the white set. Gradually, the sounds of ocean combined with the musical background can once again be heard. Monohull’s mouth gapes for a moment before he says, “Wha… whh… what did you just do? What happened? What did you do with my nephew?”

Catamaran puts up both hands, smiles and placates his friend, “No worries, dude. I got him. I just put him in my other hull.”

Monohull numbly repeats, “Your other hull.”

Catamaran nods complacently while pulling a rum drink out of thin air, “Like a drink while the kids play?”

Monohull grudgingly accepts the drink and mutters, “Just don’t lose him in there. My sister would kill me.”
* * *

Tale Tales
Originally uploaded by toastfloats.

Monohulls are often spacious with pleasant, comfortable interiors. However, the bottom line is that it’s one long tube in the water through which sound carries with mind-boggling efficiency. With children aboard, it’s hard to escape their presence as they tromp through, over and around you while you serve drinks, prep dinner, or just relax with a good book.

In a catamaran, on the other hand, you can simply hand over a hull to the younger set. Kids can convert a bow locker into a playroom, the cockpit into a jungle gym, and the tramp into… well… a trampoline. They string net and float toys underneath the salon for a neat, shady and comfortable swim dock, and they build pup tent forts into their cabins.

But seriously. Be careful. They do occasionally get lost when playing hide ‘n seek.

* Author’s Note: All credit to the Apple Get a Mac marketing team whose incredibly clever work inspired this series.